(So i typed this entry during the wee hours of tuesday morning, but only posted it up today. Sorry for the lateness folks!)
So it's the first day of school, and also the first lesson for CS3216! Before class, i was nervous, tired, but more than anything, i was excited. Excited because this really is a module that i want to take, and want to do well in. Excited because i'd finally be able to think again.
Stepping into the video conferencing room booked for the occasion was like an elephant barging into a glasshouse. In that instant, i felt trapped. I've no idea why. Perhaps it was simply the acknowledgement that i'd stepped into a class filled with geniuses. Geniuses in their own field. And i was the lowest amongst them. Uni tends to do that to you.As the class progressed, the excitement that had been building up started to transform into something altogether-ly different - fear. Fear that i would not be able to meet the expectations of this great class, fear that i, a second generation CS3216sian, would fail to not only meet the success of the previous batch, but to outdazzle the achievements - bringing CS3216 to a different level altogether. You see, to me, it's not about the grade. Grades don't make who you are. It's about why i'm even studying at all. If it's to learn, then i'd better jolly well do my best in what i'm learning. Reach for the moon - even if you miss, you'll land amongst the stars.
And still, apprehensiveness fills me. i can't programme. i don't even understand the techy jargon. what if i don't learn in time? But still, i'll try my darnest, and hopefully, i'll come out still a designer, not a programmer. Because we should each do what we do best, yes? And so i'm typing this entry with the innocent child like faith, with no intent whatsoever to offend. And as the road ahead becomes rockier, as we become more sleep deprived, as i struggle to cope with all my modules, i want to come back to this entry filled with hope, filled with excitement, filled with dreams. and keep keeping this dream alive.
it's just 4 months, after all.
And it's tuesday already - in 6 hours, the op will start, and my mouth will be clamped shut to the heavenly blessings of good solid food.
All you people out there - TREASURE the simple pleasures in life!
(Pictures up when i get them :))
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Because we should each do what we do best, yes?
ReplyDeleteYes, but really helps to know stuff above and beyond what you're good at. The world is achanging and the need is ever greatest today to work in inter-disciplinary teams.
If you want to be a designer in the IT industry, then you have to understand how the programmers work and how they think and how to work with them. Designers and programmers don't think the same way. You will understand soon enough. ;-P
i want to come back to this entry filled with hope, filled with excitement, filled with dreams.
Hope is good. That's what keeps us alive. :-)
this entry is really cute
ReplyDeletehaha.. thanks proj ben! I'll try my best to absorb as much programming stuff that's going on! Hopefully i'll become better at abusing my computer by the end of this course! :P
ReplyDeleteThanks toan!
- huihui
I'd like to believe that most experts aren't born. Also, lectures and schools can only do so much to provide you with the foundations. Its up to the individual to drive him or herself to keep improving.
ReplyDeleteHeard of Tyler Projects? It's a successful local startup company dealing in games programming. Battlestations on facebook is their work. Their product, Mobile Weapon, is pre-installed on many mobile devices the world over. Guess what? Its founded by 3 undergrads from SMU who gathered around MacDonalds weekly to experiment with their dreams.
No sky is too high, if you soar with your own wings. =)
you will find your own strengths along the way. I've work with many great non-programmer in this class and it turned out extremely well!
ReplyDeleteBen chose you for a reason ;)
Hey Hui Hui, 3 words: "Software Design Document". That's my role in the team as well, designing the app look and feel and documenting process flows or how the user would use the application.
ReplyDeleteAs hard as I try not to say this, but I'm sure for each one of us in the class, Prof Ben must have thought "the Force is strong with this one" before placing us on his Padawan list.
Cheers :-)
haha.. thanks you guys for all the encouragement! This is really some special class huh. Frankly, uni's become a pretty scary place ever since i've realised that there are a HUGE number of geniuses here. (And most of these geniuses don't even need to think to score As for their exams!)
ReplyDeleteJanus, u're a terrible person! I went to look up Tyler projs, and now i'm hooked onto their games >.<
HT, i'm assuming u're Hong Ting, yes?
p.s: does anyone know how i can get updates when people comment on my blog? :S